No one gets through recovery entirely on their own. Whether you’re managing depression, anxiety, substance use, or any other mental health challenge, having a good support network can make all the difference between just coping and actively healing. Go “find support” is such easy advice to give and even harder advice to follow. You may not know who to trust or if trusting a close friend or family member is going to result in them distancing themselves from you. It’s also hard to trust when your own energy is feeling low.
Take a few minutes to think about who has been there for you in the past, maybe a friend who listens and is empathetic, maybe a relative who checks in with you frequently, or a co-worker who has noticed when you weren’t yourself and asked how you were doing. Take a moment to reach out, even it’s briefly. Send them a quick text like, “Hey, just wanted to say I appreciate you” and it can reopen a connection to that person without pressure or expectation.
A support network can be one person, but sometimes, more people can be beneficial, both for you and for them. You might have one friend who’s always up for a walk and to talk about life and what’s going on, another one who can help you navigate paperwork, and someone else who understands recovery firsthand because they have been through it themselves. Having a mix of emotional, practical, and peer support gives your support network more depth and balance, and it helps to share the emotional load so one person doesn’t get burned out.
Community groups, recovery programs, therapy groups, and in-person and online meetings can all be part of your network. These settings are especially valuable because they’re built around people who “get it”. Don’t underestimate how powerful it can be to hear, “I’ve gone through this” or “I am going through this now myself.”
It is all too easy to say, “I’m fine” when you’re anything but fine. Most people want to help but don’t know where to start. If someone has expressed an interest in helping, but also said they don’t know how – start simple and be specific. “Could you check in with me once a week?” or “Can you just listen, not try to fix things? I just need to get it out.” Setting some small and very clear asks helps someone who wants to help be more comfortable in being able to help.
Support networks work best when they go both ways. When you have the mental and/or physical bandwidth, check in on someone else, make them a cup of coffee or tea, send a funny joke or meme – it helps remind you that you’re not just a person in need, but a person who contributes. Mutual support builds dignity and builds connections, both extremely important parts of recovery.
A strong support network isn’t about loyalty at all costs; it’s about honesty and growth for all involved. If a relationship feels one-sided or you’re not getting something from it, it’s okay to pull back. Likewise, stay open to new people entering your circle of recovery and healing.
Don’t forget to reach out when you’re doing okay, not just when you’re in trouble. Building balanced relationships means that those relationships will be stronger and easier to lean on when things get hard.
For more information about our programs, please visit https://www.westbridge.org/programs/.
WestBridge provides evidence-based treatment for adults and their families experiencing mental illness with or without substance use. Contact admissions for inquiries and questions